Tag Archives: Groucho Marx

What’s Your Quotation Quotient? #438

Published August 23, 2015 at Montereyherald.com/lifestyle (Interactive version)


 

1. “Do not pray for an easy life; pray for the strength to endure a difficult one.”

A. Bruce Lee

B. Bruce Wayne

C. Bruce Springsteen

2. “Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself.”

A. Jared Fogle

B. Groucho Marx

C. Muhammad Ali

3. “I always did like a man in uniform. And that one fits you grand. Why don’t you come up sometime and see me?”

A. Mamie Eisenhower

B. Sally Field

C. Mae West

4. “The behavior of the insane is merely sane behavior, a bit exaggerated and distorted.”

A. Kevin Bacon

B. George Washington

C. Aldous Huxley

5. “You don’t know what pressure is until you’ve played for $5 a hole with only $2 in your pocket.”

A. Lee Trevino

B. Tiger Woods

C. Smokey Robinson

6. “A Book of Verses underneath the Bough,/  A Jug of Wine, a Loaf of Bread-and Thou/  Beside me singing in the Wilderness-/  O, Wilderness were Paradise enow!”

A. Omar Khayyam

B. Maya Angelou

C. Bob Dylan

7. “Politicians are a set of men who have interests aside from the interests of the people and who, to say the most of them, are, taken as a mass, at least one long step removed from honest men.”

A. Chris Christie

B. Abraham Lincoln

C. Jacques Cousteau

8. “Helping a billion people connect is amazing, humbling and by far the thing I am most proud of in my life.”

A. Donald Trump

B. Mark Zuckerberg

C. Mao Zedong

9. “Rose is a rose is a rose is a rose.”

A. Gertrude Stein

B. Bette Midler

C. John Steinbeck

10. “A thing is not necessarily true because a man dies for it.”

A. Marilyn Monroe

B. Lewis Carroll

C. Oscar Wilde

 

Answers: 1-A, 2-B , 3-C , 4-C , 5-A , 6-A , 7-B , 8-B , 9-A , 10-C

Scoring:               10–QQQQ = Quote-Master   

(number correct)        8-9–QQQ = Scholar                       

                                   6-7–QQ = Literate

                                  4-5–Q = Semi-Literate

                                 0-3–No Q = Quote-Dunce

BONUS QUOTE:

“It’s hard to feel middle-aged, because how can you tell how long you are going to live?”

―Mignon McLaughlin, 1913-1983, was an American journalist and author of “Neurotic’s Notebook.”

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What’s Your QQ*? #400

*QUOTATION QUOTIENT

(Published November 23, 2014 in the Monterey Herald.)

 

1. “A thankful heart is not only the greatest virtue, but the parent of all other virtues.”

 

A. Cicero

B. Vladimir Putin

C. Michael Jackson

 

2. “The illusion that times that were are better than those that are, has probably pervaded all ages.”

 

A. Charlie Chaplin

B. Harry Houdini

C. Horace Greeley

 

3. “Now there is one outstandingly important fact regarding Spaceship Earth, and that is that no instruction book came with it.”

 

A. Jules Verne

B. Buckminster Fuller

C. Alf Landon

 

4. “New ideas are one of the most overrated concepts of our time. Most of the important ideas that we live with aren’t new at all.”

 

A. Andy Williams

B. Andy Kaufman

C. Andy Rooney

 

5. “I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.”

 

A. Alan Dershowitz

B. Groucho Marx

C. Aaron Copeland

 

6. “A poet is a bird of unearthly excellence, who escapes from his celestial realm arrives in this world warbling. If we do not cherish him, he spreads his wings and flies back into his homeland.”

 

A. Khalil Gibran

B. Jeff Foxworthy

C. Lewis Carroll

 

7. “[A ghost story] must depend for its effect solely on what one might call its thermometrical quality; if it sends a cold shiver down one’s spine, it has done its job and done it well.”

 

A. Charles Dickens

B. Edith Wharton

C. Adlai Stevenson

 

8. “I am at two with nature.”

 

A. Woody Allen

B. John Muir

C. Mario Andretti

 

9. “Words are, of course, the most powerful drug used by mankind.”

 

A. Timothy Leary

B. Neil Armstrong

C. Rudyard Kipling

 

10. “I like football. I find its an exciting strategic game. Its a great way to avoid conversation with your family at Thanksgiving.”

 

A. Craig Ferguson

B. Humphrey Bogart

C. Frank Gifford

 

 

Answers: 1-A, 2-C , 3-B , 4-C , 5-B , 6-A , 7-B , 8-A , 9-C , 10-A

 

Scoring:               10–QQQQ = Quote-Master   

(number correct)        8-9–QQQ = Scholar                       

                                   6-7–QQ = Literate

                                  4-5–Q = Semi-Literate

                                 0-3–No Q = Quote-Dunce

 

BONUS QUOTE:

 “None is more impoverished than the one who has no gratitude. Gratitude is a currency that we can mint for ourselves, and spend without fear of bankruptcy.” ~Fred De Witt Van Amburgh

 (Van Amburgh, 1866-1944, was an American writer of inspirational articles and books.)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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What’s Your QQ*? #395

*QUOTATION QUOTIENT

(Published October 19, 2014 in the Monterey Herald.)

 

1. “I suppose it is tempting, if the only tool you have is a hammer, to treat everything as if it were a nail.”

 

A. Pete Seeger

B. Abraham Maslow

C. Gerald Ford

 

2. “Make wars unprofitable and you make them impossible.”

 

A. Dick Cheney

B. Gene Autry

C. A. Philip Randolph

 

3. “Sometime they’ll give a war and nobody will come.”

 

A. John McCain

B. Carl Sandburg

C. Peyton Manning

 

4. “Life is a disease; and the only difference between one another is the stage of the disease at which he lives”

 

A. George Takei

B. George Washington

C. George Bernard Shaw

 

5. “’Tis an ill cook that cannot lick his own fingers.”

 

A. Colonel Sanders

B. Rachael Ray

C. William Shakespeare

 

6. “We do not talk – we bludgeon one another with facts and theories gleaned from cursory readings of newspapers, magazines and digests.”

 

A. George Will

B. Henry Miller

C. Thomas Paine

 

7. “There are more criminals out of jail than in jail, the only difference is that the majority of those who are out, are such skillful criminals that they know how to keep themselves out.”
A. Marcus Garvey

B. Mandy Patinkin

C. J.P. Morgan

 

8. “She got her looks from her father. He’s a plastic surgeon.”

 

A. Pamela Anderson

B. Maria Callas

C. Groucho Marx

 

9. “No verse can give pleasure for long, nor last, that is written by drinkers of water.”

 

A. Horace

B. Robert Frost

C. Dean Martin

 

10. “Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice, but for those who love, time is eternity.”

 

A. Henry van Dyke

B. Dick Van Dyke

C. Jerry Van Dyke

 

 

 

Answers: 1-B, 2-C , 3-B , 4-C , 5-C , 6-B , 7-A , 8-C , 9-A , 10-A

 

Scoring:               10–QQQQ = Quote-Master   

(number correct)        8-9–QQQ = Scholar                       

                                   6-7–QQ = Literate

                                  4-5–Q = Semi-Literate

                                 0-3–No Q = Quote-Dunce

 

BONUS QUOTE:

 

“Love and time, those are the only two things in all the world and all of life that cannot be bought, but only spent.”  ― Gary Jennings

 (Jennings, 1928-1999, was an American author of adult and children’s books.)

 

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What’s Your QQ*? #344

*Quotation Quotient

  (Published October 27, 2013 in the Monterey County Herald.)

1. “On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me.”

A. Rodney Dangerfield

B. Freddy Krueger

C. John Foster Dulles

2. “I don’t care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.”

A. Harpo Marx

B. Groucho Marx

C. Warren Buffett

3. “Water, water, every where,/ And all the boards did shrink;/

Water, water, every where,/ Nor any drop to drink.”

A. Samuel Taylor Coleridge

B. Tom Hanks

C. Edgar Allan Poe

4. “If our American way of life fails the child, it fails us all. ”

A. Carrie White

B. Pearl S. Buck

C. Honus Wagner

5. “The greatest monarch on the proudest throne is obliged to sit upon his own arse.”

A. Prince Charles

B. Mark Twain

C. Benjamin Franklin

6. “If a man sits down to think, he is immediately asked if has a headache.”

A. Auguste Rodin

B. Ralph Waldo Emerson

C. Plato

7. “Is life so dear or peace so sweet as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery? Forbid it, Almighty God! I know not what course other may take; but as for me, give me liberty or give me death!”

A. Aaron Burr

B. Bea Arthur

C. Patrick Henry

8. “There is a time to take counsel of your fears, and there is a time to never listen to any fear.”

A. George S. Patton

B. Snooki

C. Alexander Hamilton

9. “They wrote in the old days that it is sweet and fitting to die for one’s country. But in modern war there is nothing sweet nor fitting in your dying. You will die like a dog for no good reason.”

A. Ernest Hemingway

B. John McCain

C. Jonathan Livingston Seagull

10. “A house is never still in darkness to those who listen intently; there is a whispering in distant chambers, an unearthly hand presses the snib of the window, the latch rises.  Ghosts were created when the first man awoke in the night. “

A. Lesley Stahl

B. J.M. Barrie

C. Boris Karloff

 

Answers: 1-A, 2-B , 3-A , 4-B , 5-C , 6-B , 7-C , 8-A , 9-A , 10-B

Scoring:               10–QQQQ = Quote-Master   

(number correct)        8-9–QQQ = Scholar                       

                                   6-7–QQ = Literate

                                  4-5–Q = Semi-Literate

                                 0-3–No Q = Quote-Dunce

 BONUS QUOTE:

 “Nothing on Earth so beautiful as the final haul on Halloween night.” – Steve Almond

 (Almond, 1966- , is an American short story writer and essayist.)

 


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