Tag Archives: Dorothy Parker

What’s Your QQ*? #417

(Published March 22, 2015 at Montereyherald.com/lifestyle, Interactive version)


 

1. “The trick in life isn’t getting what you want, my dear, it’s wanting it after you get it.”

 

A. Katharine Hepburn

B. Fyodor Dostoevsky

C. Eldridge Cleaver

 

2. “If all the young ladies who attended the Yale promenade dance were laid end to end, no one would be the least surprised.”

 

A. Irving Berlin

B. John Kerry

C. Dorothy Parker

 

3. “Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.”

 

A. Abraham Lincoln

B. Albert Einstein

C. Jennifer Lopez

 

4. “The thought of death has now become a part of my life. I read the obituaries every day just for the satisfaction of not seeing my name there.”

 

A. Neil Simon

B. Neil deGrasse Tyson

C. Neil Patrick Harris

 

5. “Fame is a fickle food/ Upon a shifting plate.”

 

A. Rachael Ray

B. Emily Dickinson

C. Donald Trump

 

 6. “We sleep, but the loom of life never stops, and the pattern which was weaving when the sun went down is weaving when it comes up in the morning.”

 

A. Yogi Berra

B. Whoopi Goldberg

C. Henry Ward Beecher

 

7. “Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot.”

 

A. Charlie Chaplin

B. Ringo Starr

C. Anwar al-Sadat

 

8. “Do you think that when they asked George Washington for ID that he just whipped out a quarter?”

 

A. Steven Spielberg

B. Steven Wright

C. Steven Seagal

 

9. “The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.”

 

A. Marcel Marceau

B. Salvador Dali

C. Mark Twain

 

10. “Every relationship you are in will fail, until one doesn’t.”

 

A. Dan Savage

B. Larry King

C. Al Jolson

 

 

Answers: 1-A, 2-C , 3-B , 4-A , 5-B , 6-C , 7-A , 8-B , 9-C , 10-A

 

Scoring:               10–QQQQ = Quote-Master   

(number correct)        8-9–QQQ = Scholar                       

                                   6-7–QQ = Literate

                                  4-5–Q = Semi-Literate

                                 0-3–No Q = Quote-Dunce

 

BONUS QUOTE:

 

“Mankind is safer when men seek pleasure than when they seek the power and the glory.”

―Geoffrey Gorer

 

(Gorer, 1905-1985, was an English anthropologist and author.)

 

 

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What’s Your QQ*? #404

*QUOTATION QUOTIENT

(Published December 21, 2014 in the Monterey Herald.)

 

1. “My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?”

 

A. Bob Hope

B. Newt Gingrich

C. Yasser Arafat

 

2. “Our desires always increase with our possessions. The knowledge that something remains yet unenjoyed impairs our enjoyment of the good before us.”

 

A. Samuel Goldwyn

B. Samuel L. Jackson

C. Samuel Johnson

 

3. “Senescence begins/  And middle-age ends/  The day your descendants/  Outnumber your friends.”

 

A. Pablo Picasso

B. Ogden Nash

C. Rock Hudson

 

4. “I should not talk so much about myself if there were anybody else whom I knew as well.”

 

A. Henry David Thoreau

B. Joseph Stalin

C. Plato

 

5. “If man does find the solution for world peace it will be the most revolutionary reversal of his record we have ever known.”

 

A. George C. Marshall

B. J.D. Salinger

C. Jimmy Kimmel

 

6. “It’s a hell of a thing; killin’ a man. You take away everything he ever had and ever would have.”

 

A. Andy Griffith

B. Clint Eastwood

C. Rick Perry

 

7. “I love Paris in the spring time/ I love Paris in the fall/ I love Paris in the summer when it sizzles/ I love Paris in the winter when it drizzles.”

 

A. Maurice Chevalier

B. Dwight Eisenhower

C. Cole Porter

 

8. “I might repeat to myself, slowly and soothingly, a list of quotations beautiful from minds profound; if I can remember any of the damn things.”

 

A. Dorothy Parker

B. John Bartlett

C. William Wordsworth

 

9. “So long as little children are allowed to suffer, there is no true love in this world.”

 

A. Isadora Duncan

B. W. C. Fields

C. Randy Newman

 

10. “How many observe Christ’s birthday! How few, his precepts! O! ’tis easier to keep holidays than commandments.”

 

A. Buddha

B. Benjamin Franklin

C. Pat Boone

 

 

Answers: 1-A, 2-C , 3-B , 4-A , 5-A , 6-B , 7-C , 8-A , 9-A , 10-B

 

Scoring:               10–QQQQ = Quote-Master   

(number correct)        8-9–QQQ = Scholar                       

                                   6-7–QQ = Literate

                                  4-5–Q = Semi-Literate

                                 0-3–No Q = Quote-Dunce

 

BONUS QUOTE:

“Christmas Eve was a night of song that wrapped itself about you like a shawl. But it warmed more than your body. It warmed your heart…filled it, too, with melody that would last forever.”― Bess Streeter Aldrich

 (Aldrich, 1881-1954, was one of Nebraska’s most widely read and enjoyed authors.)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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What’s Your QQ*? #388

*QUOTATION QUOTIENT

(Published August 31, 2014 in the Monterey Herald.)

 

1. “I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.”

 

A. Bill Cosby

B. Raymond Burr

C. David Carradine

 

2. “Life’s tragedy is that we get old too soon and wise too late.”

 

A. Rutherford B. Hayes

B. Benjamin Franklin

C. Justin Bieber

 

3. “Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.”

 

A. George Burns

B. Satchel Paige

C. Mark Twain

 

4. “I’m so fast that last night I turned off the light switch in my hotel room and was in bed before the room was dark.”

 

A. Usain Bolt

B. Muhammad Ali

C. Orson Welles

 

5. “If you are going through hell, keep going.”

 

A. George Gershwin

B. Winston Churchill

C. Tiger Woods

 

6. “Ideas are more powerful than guns. We would not let our enemies have guns, why should we let them have ideas.”

 

A. Joseph Stalin

B. Jodie Foster

C. Franklin D. Roosevelt

 

7. “For me, I am driven by two main philosophies: know more today about the world than I knew yesterday and lessen the suffering of others. You’d be surprised how far that gets you.”

 

A. Thomas Jefferson

B. Ricky Ricardo

C. Neil deGrasse Tyson

 

8. “Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get.”

 

A. Albert Camus

B. Forrest Gump

C. Willy Wonka

 

9. “There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self.”

 

A. Frank Sinatra

B. Chaz Bono

C. Ernest Hemingway

 

10. “Heterosexuality is not normal, it’s just common.”

 

A. Ed Sullivan

B. Dorothy Parker

C. Fidel Castro

 

 

Answers: 1-A, 2-B , 3-C , 4-B , 5-B , 6-A , 7-C , 8- B, 9-C , 10-B

 

Scoring:               10–QQQQ = Quote-Master   

(number correct)        8-9–QQQ = Scholar                       

                                   6-7–QQ = Literate

                                  4-5–Q = Semi-Literate

                                 0-3–No Q = Quote-Dunce

 BONUS QUOTE:

 

“Labor Day is a glorious holiday because your child will be going back to school the next day. It would have been called Independence Day, but that name was already taken.” — Bill Dodds

 (Dodds is a poet and novelist for young readers.)

 

 

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What’s Your QQ*? #366

*Quotation Quotient

(Published March 30, 2014 in the Monterey County Herald.)

 

1. “In times of change, learners inherit the earth, while the learned find themselves beautifully equipped to deal with a world that no longer exists.”

A. Eric Hoffer

B. Eric Clapton

C. Eric Cantor

 

2. “No man ever yet became great by imitation.”

A. Elvis Presley

B. Jimmy Fallon

C. Samuel Johnson

 

3. “You never realize how short a month is until you pay alimony.”

A. John Barrymore

B. Condoleezza Rice

C. Paul McCartney

 

4. “Were it left to me to decide whether we should have a government without newspapers, or newspapers without a government, I should not hesitate a moment to prefer the latter.”

A. Phil Bowhay

B. Thomas Jefferson

C. Rupert Murdoch

 

5. “Armaments, universal debt and planned obsolescence — those are the three pillars of Western prosperity.”

A. Kim Jong-un

B. Bill Mahr

C. Aldous Huxley

 

6. “Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise.”

A. Benjamin Franklin

B. Groucho Marx

C. Jack LaLanne

 

7. “The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of the tires.”

A. Immanuel Kant

B. Dorothy Parker

C. Mario Andretti

 

8. “Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don’t have film.”

A. Marilu Henner

B. Mathew Brady

C. Steven Wright

 

9. “She wears her clothes as if they are thrown on with a pitchfork”

A. Jonathan Swift

B. Chelsea Handler

C. Donatella Versace

 

10. “When you cease to make a contribution, you begin to die.”

A. Jerry Lewis

B. Eleanor Roosevelt

C. Warren G. Harding

 

 

Answers1-A, 2- C, 3-A, 4-B , 5-C , 6-A , 7-B , 8-C , 9-A , 10-B

 Scoring:              10–QQQQ = Quote-Master   

(number correct)       8-9–QQQ = Scholar                       

                                  6-7–QQ = Literate

                                 4-5–Q = Semi-Literate

                                 0-3–No Q=Quote-Dunce

 

BONUS QUOTE:

 “The friendships which last are those wherein each friend respects the other’s dignity to the point of not really wanting anything from him.”

– Cyril Connolly

 (Connolly, 1903-1974, was an English novelist and literary critic.)

 

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