Tag Archives: Jon Stewart

What’s Your Quotation Quotient? #451

Published November 22, 2015 at Montereyherald.com/lifestyle (Click HERE to play the Interactive version)


1. “There is one day that is ours. Thanksgiving Day is the one day that is purely American.”

A. P. Diddy

B. R. Kelly

C. O. Henry

2. “I tried being reasonable, I didn’t like it.”

A. Reggie Jackson

B. Clint Eastwood

C. Doris Day

3. “An intellectual snob is someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture and not think of The Lone Ranger.”

A. Dan Rather

B. William McKinley

C. Clayton Moore

4. “We have so far to go to realize our human potential for compassion, altruism, and love.”

A. Jane Goodall

B. Jane Eyre

C. Jane Seymour

5. “When I started counting my blessings, my whole life turned around.”

A. Don Rickles

B. Henry Kissinger

C. Willie Nelson

6. “A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car, but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad.”

A. Jackie Gleason

B. Cornelius Vanderbilt

C. Theodore Roosevelt

7. “When I need a little free advice about Saddam Hussein, I turn to country music.”

A. Carrie Underwood

B. George H. W. Bush

C. Mark Twain

8. “If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.”

A. Frank Zappa

B. Socrates

C. John Dewey

9. “Trust me, Greg, when you start having little Fockers running around, you’ll feel the need for this type of security.”

A. “Casablanca”

B. “National Lampoon’s Vacation”

C. “Meet the Parents”

10. “I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.”

A. Jon Stewart

B. Tony Stewart

C. Martha Stewart


Answers: 1-C, 2-B , 3-A , 4-A , 5-C , 6-C , 7-B , 8-A , 9-C , 10-A

Scoring:               10–QQQQ = Quote-Master   

(number correct)        8-9–QQQ = Scholar                       

                                   6-7–QQ = Literate

                                  4-5–Q = Semi-Literate

                                 0-3–No Q = Quote-Dunce


“An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day.”

— Irv Kupcinet, 1912-2003, was a newspaper columnist for the Chicago Sun-Times.


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What’s Your QQ*? #322

*Quotation Quotient

  (Published May 26, 2013 in the Monterey County Herald.)

1. “A person with a new idea is a crank until the idea succeeds.”

 A. Mark Zuckerberg

B. Mark Twain

C. Mark Cuban

2. “Power can be taken, but not given. The process of the taking is empowerment in itself.”

A. Sandra Day O’Conner

B. Richard Dreyfuss

C. Gloria Steinem

3. “There can be hope only for a society which acts as one big family, not as many separate ones.”

A. Anwar Sadat

B. Marcia Brady

C. Abraham Lincoln

4. “A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.”

A. Jim Morrison

B. Seth Meyers

C. Ogden Nash

5. “Religion. It’s given people hope in a world torn apart by religion.”

A. Jon Stewart

B. Norman Vincent Peale

C. Joe Biden

6. “I hold it true, whate’er befall;/  I feel it, when I sorrow most;/  Tis better to have loved and lost/  Than never to have loved at all.”

A. Horatio Alger

B. Laura Ingalls Wilder

C. Alfred Tennyson

7. “I’ve been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds out, she’ll kill me.”         

A. Henny Youngman

B. Arnold Schwarzenegger

C. Jay Leno

8. “There never will be complete equality until women themselves help to make laws and elect lawmakers.”

A. Susan Sarandon

B. Susan B. Anthony

C. Susan Boyle

9. “Flowers have an expression of countenance as much as men or animals. Some seem to smile, some have a sad expression, some are pensive and diffident, others again are plain, honest and upright, like the broad-faced sunflower and the hollyhock.”  

A. Bruce Springsteen

B. Henry Ward Beecher

C. L. Frank Baum

10. “This is the short and the long of it.”

A. Herman Melville

B. Randy Newman

C. William Shakespeare


Answers: 1-B, 2-C , 3-A , 4-C , 5-A , 6-C , 7-A , 8-B , 9-B , 10-C


Scoring:               10–QQQQ = Quote-Master   

(number correct)        8-9–QQQ = Scholar                       

                                   6-7–QQ = Literate

                                  4-5–Q = Semi-Literate

                                 0-3–No Q = Quote-Dunce


 “There are some things that should never be mentioned in polite society – f’r instance, the doings of Polite Society.” – Elbert Hubbard

 (Hubbard, 1856-1915, was an American writer, publisher, artist and philosopher. He died aboard the Lusitania during WWI.)



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