Tag Archives: Jonathan Swift

What’s Your QQ*? #366

*Quotation Quotient

(Published March 30, 2014 in the Monterey County Herald.)

 

1. “In times of change, learners inherit the earth, while the learned find themselves beautifully equipped to deal with a world that no longer exists.”

A. Eric Hoffer

B. Eric Clapton

C. Eric Cantor

 

2. “No man ever yet became great by imitation.”

A. Elvis Presley

B. Jimmy Fallon

C. Samuel Johnson

 

3. “You never realize how short a month is until you pay alimony.”

A. John Barrymore

B. Condoleezza Rice

C. Paul McCartney

 

4. “Were it left to me to decide whether we should have a government without newspapers, or newspapers without a government, I should not hesitate a moment to prefer the latter.”

A. Phil Bowhay

B. Thomas Jefferson

C. Rupert Murdoch

 

5. “Armaments, universal debt and planned obsolescence — those are the three pillars of Western prosperity.”

A. Kim Jong-un

B. Bill Mahr

C. Aldous Huxley

 

6. “Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise.”

A. Benjamin Franklin

B. Groucho Marx

C. Jack LaLanne

 

7. “The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of the tires.”

A. Immanuel Kant

B. Dorothy Parker

C. Mario Andretti

 

8. “Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don’t have film.”

A. Marilu Henner

B. Mathew Brady

C. Steven Wright

 

9. “She wears her clothes as if they are thrown on with a pitchfork”

A. Jonathan Swift

B. Chelsea Handler

C. Donatella Versace

 

10. “When you cease to make a contribution, you begin to die.”

A. Jerry Lewis

B. Eleanor Roosevelt

C. Warren G. Harding

 

 

Answers1-A, 2- C, 3-A, 4-B , 5-C , 6-A , 7-B , 8-C , 9-A , 10-B

 Scoring:              10–QQQQ = Quote-Master   

(number correct)       8-9–QQQ = Scholar                       

                                  6-7–QQ = Literate

                                 4-5–Q = Semi-Literate

                                 0-3–No Q=Quote-Dunce

 

BONUS QUOTE:

 “The friendships which last are those wherein each friend respects the other’s dignity to the point of not really wanting anything from him.”

- Cyril Connolly

 (Connolly, 1903-1974, was an English novelist and literary critic.)

 

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What’s Your QQ*? #346

*Quotation Quotient

  (Published November 10, 2013 in the Monterey County Herald.)

1. “‘You are old, father William,’ the young man said,/  ‘And your hair has become very white;/ And yet you incessantly stand on your head/  Do you think, at your age, it is right?’”

A. William the Conqueror  

B. Lewis Carroll

C. Father Junipero Serra

2. “Nothing marks the change from the city to the country so much as the absence of grinding noises. The country is never silent. But its sounds are separate, distinct, and as it were, articulate.”

A. Henry Ward Beecher

B. Benjamin Franklin

C. Frank Sinatra

3. “Life is made up of sobs, sniffles, and smiles, with sniffles predominating.”

A. R. Kelly

B. C. Everett Koop

C. O. Henry

4. “Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.”

A. Friedrich Nietzsche

B. Mary Shelley

C. Lon Chaney

5. “‘Tis an old maxim in the schools,/ That flattery’s the food of fools;/

Yet now and then your men of wit/ Will condescend to take a bit.”

A. Jonathan Swift

B. Will Rogers

C. Mae West

6. “Whenever a man has cast a longing eye on offices, a rottenness begins in his conduct.” 

A. Ted Cruz

B. Thomas Jefferson

C. Steve Carell

7. “If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?”

A. Dr. Jekyll

B. Emmett Kelly

C. Abraham Lincoln

8. “Wealth is not without its advantages and the case to the contrary, although it has often been made, has never proved widely persuasive. ”

A. Emily Dickinson

B. John Kenneth Galbraith

C. Michael Bloomberg

9. “We march up, moody or good-tempered soldiers – we reach the zone where the front begins and become on the instant human animals.” 

A. Erich Maria Remarque

B. Erich Fromm

C. Eric Clapton

10. “A fool learns from his experience. A wise person learns from the experience of others.” 

A. Walter White

B. Vladimir Lenin

C. Otto von Bismarck

Answers: 1-B, 2-A , 3-C , 4-A , 5-A , 6-B , 7-C , 8-B , 9-A , 10-C

Scoring:               10–QQQQ = Quote-Master   

(number correct)        8-9–QQQ = Scholar                       

                                   6-7–QQ = Literate

                                  4-5–Q = Semi-Literate

                                 0-3–No Q = Quote-Dunce

BONUS QUOTE:

“We don’t understand life any better at forty than at twenty, but by then we realize it and admit it.” – Jules Renard

 (Renard, 1864-1910, was a French author.)

 

 

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What’s Your QQ*? #342

*Quotation Quotient

  (Published October 13, 2013 in the Monterey County Herald.)

1. “To argue with a man who has renounced the use and authority of reason, and whose philosophy consists in holding humanity in contempt, is like administering medicine to the dead, or endeavoring to convert an atheist by scripture.”

A. Franklin D. Roosevelt

B. Thomas Paine

C. Bill Murray

2. “I thank God for my handicaps. For through them, I have found myself, my work and my God.”

A. Helen Keller

B. Stephen Hawking

C. Larry Flynt

 3. “What light through yonder window breaks?/ It is the east, and Juliet is the sun.”

A. William Shakespeare

B. Margaret Thatcher

C. Galileo Galilei

4. “The urge to save humanity is almost always only a false-face for the urge to rule it.”

A. Rudolph Hess

B. Frank Lloyd Wright

C. H.L. Mencken

5. “Nobody, as long as he moves about among the chaotic currents of life, is without trouble.”

A. Carl Jung

B. Humphrey Bogart

C. Dr. Drew Pinsky

6. “There is one thing about being President — nobody can tell you when to sit down.”

A. Mitt Romney

B. Thomas Jefferson

C. Dwight Eisenhower

7. “There is much to be said in favour of modern journalism. By giving us the opinions of the uneducated, it keeps us in touch with the ignorance of the community.”

A. Scarlett Johansson

B. Oscar Wilde

C. Anderson Cooper

8. “Sickness is a belief, which must be annihilated by the divine Mind.”

A. Mary Baker Eddy

B. Tom Cruise

C. Dr. Oz

9. “The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don’t want, drink what you don’t like, and do what you’d rather not.”

A. Richard Simmons

B. John Kerry

C. Mark Twain

10. “We have just enough religion to make us hate, but not enough to make us love one another.”

A. Jonathan Livingston Seagull

B. Jonathan Winters

C. Jonathan Swift

 

Answers: 1-B, 2-A , 3-A , 4-C , 5-A , 6-C , 7-B , 8-A , 9-C , 10-C

Scoring:               10–QQQQ = Quote-Master   

(number correct)        8-9–QQQ = Scholar                       

                                   6-7–QQ = Literate

                                  4-5–Q = Semi-Literate

                                 0-3–No Q = Quote-Dunce

BONUS QUOTE:

“A good scare is worth more to a man than good advice.” -

Edward W. Howe

 (Howe, 1853-1937, was an American author and editor.)

 

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What’s Your QQ? #302

Published January 6, 2013 in the Monterey County Herald

Who said?

“People want to know why I do this, why I write such gross stuff. I like to tell them I have the heart of a small boy… and I keep it in a jar on my desk.” 

BONUS QUOTE OF THE DAY:

“As to the Seven Deadly Sins, I deplore Pride, Wrath, Lust, Envy, and Greed. Gluttony and Sloth I pretty much plan my day around.” – Robert Brault

 (Blaut is a free-lance writer from Connecticut.)

 

 

 

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